What do diets & budgets have in common? 🍕💸

What comes to mind when you hear the word budget? 💸

How about the word, diet? 🥗

For me, it's: Restriction. Rules. Shame. Guilt. Pass/fail. Saying “no”. No fun. No deliciousness. No release.
 

Both food and money are areas where you were probably taught that willpower is the answer. 💪

It's the message that if you could just try harder—be “better”—you'd finally feel in control.

But here's the truth: restriction almost always backfires.
 

And what does “backfire” look like in budgets and diets? Spending way over your previous limit.💳😬 Eating past comfortable fullness. Both often lead to feeling shame and hopelessness. 😞

When these things happen, it's not a personal failure, it's a sign that your deeper needs aren't being met.

And the keys to getting to a more loving relationship with both money and food is to identify and honor and take action towards your deeper needs. ✨

Here's an example: 

I pause myself before buying a concert ticket. 🎟️ The price is really over my comfort level. But my friends are going. I'm feeling major FOMO and caught. 😩

What's the deeper want in buying the ticket?

→ To have a special connection with friends. 💞

What's under that? 
→ →To feel included 🫂

What's under that?

→ → → Safety through acceptance in community. 🛟

That's what's really going on.

So buying that concert ticket is ONE way to meet that need.

Let's use this pause to think creatively. Here's a sample inner monologue:

I recognize that bowing out of the concert will feel icky for me. I understand that it's reminding me of middle school social rejection. I remind myself that I'm an adult now and my friends are still my friends. I add to the group text, “I'm bummed I can't make it to the concert 😔- I'm working on saving up for [a new car, pay down debt, trip to Spain, etc…]. Who can make it to my house for brunch on xx day? Would love to catch up.🥰 Send me videos from the concert!"

Postscript…

3 of the 4 friends can make it to brunch. My feelings of connectedness and safety in community are preserved, 💖 and I can still put $400 towards my money goal. It was awkward, but I'm proud of myself and I got through it. Plus, I inadvertently inspired one friend to set up her own savings goals!

Do you see yourself in a scenario like this? How did you navigate it? I'm not saying we need to stop all fun spending - NOT AT ALL! 🙅‍♀️

But I want you to feel good and intentional about these choices so that they are aligned with your values and your cashflow. 💫💵

What's an example of your own life when food or money choices seemed to be talking about deeper emotional needs? 👇